i did the right thing.. i think.. it was the wisest but was it the smartest thing to do?
initially i was convinced i was making something out of nothing.. out of the blue.. jus a normal everyday thing.. furthermore i wasn't interested at all to begin with.. ok i am interested in the money haha..
but in only a very short span.. my ideas were slowly gaining credibility.. once, twice.. banter chatter.. tonight it was rather evident.. i was caught in a spot
fancy of fancies! haha.. it was flattering i must say.. me? why? i cant think of anything with reason of worth..
but the answer was simple.. and im dead sure it did disappoint.. i could easily have done otherwise
there wasnt much thought put to the decision actually.. no tempting propositions in my mind thankfully.. firstly, there is no comparision.. in terms of the soul of course.. on the outside everything is deceiving.. furthermore i am strong ya see.. i have integrity.. i do what is right.. if this were a play.. i wanna be the hero not the villain..
the thing is.. would my act have been done upon me if roles were reversed.. its hard to say.. history would prove me a fool.. but my weakness is that of fervent belief.. if that can be considered a flaw..
i have been told by my closest confidant.. if selflessness or selfishness lay before you, take selfishness.. i cannot.. am i too weak? i say with a firm no. he is probably right, but its not about you, its about me.. i will not allow myself to betray myself despite all.. i will play by the rules.
i might still be making something out of nothing.. i have i knack for that dont i.. but people think i always do that.. i dont.. many are often true.. its jus that i dont like to stir a mess for myself.. well in this case, guess we'll never know..
interestingly and coincidently.. i have a choice of elated or jubilant.. thats not too bad isnt it.. i choose jubilant!